Dear Cyclists of Ontario St.,

I am writing to beg your indulgence while I remind you of things you have put aside, not doubt, out of simple lack of vigilance. We are on the same side, you understand. If there was ever a war of transportation, you and I could stand side by side knowing that we would get where we're going with similar values and ideas, albeit at differing speeds, happily not driving.

You all cycle for many reasons. Some for exercise, here we agree. Some for convenience of travel, not having to follow loads of rules and, for the most part, being able to go all sorts of places others can't, we are still on the same page. Some to be friendly to the environment, I to believe this to be a noble cause. And some just because they enjoy it which, once again, I am in total support.

So then if our two species are so compatible in terms of ideas and ideals, why, oh why, must you try to kill me every single morning? Hm?

I walk because I like it better than driving. It doesn't leave me feeling angry. Or rather it shouldn't, if it weren't for the myriad of cyclists who seem to have adopted the self righteous habits of most drivers and believe that they roads were made for them alone. I'm sorry my feet don't move as fast as your wheels. I'm sorry that when crossing the street and you come barreling around the corner that I would rather see you swerve a little bit than me have to run to avoid you. I understand that you're coming off the slopped portion of Ontario and that it is enjoyable to keep going fast. But as the more maneuverable, swifter of our two kinds, please please stop seeing me in your path and charging on anyway? I would really appreciate it.

From Harmless Pedestrian,
Jenny

Christmas = soon = good

I am still packing cds. Yesterday I did over 4000! They are about how to have the phsychology of a millionaire.

I have agreed to do a show I shouldn't have because I've realised that I've no way to get home after each night. This sucks. I want to back out but that's really dumb.

Also I realised that being in love turns me into someone really really lame...wait I already was. Ok, well it makes me more aware of it. So I try to hide it but is it really such a bad thing that I want you all the time?

And...Um...Yes, I am awesome!

So guess how I spent my day? Alligator wrestling? NO! Chasing bail jumpers across the border? NO! Putting together and packaging East Indian pop cassettes? YES! Mr. Ali Brar, the people of Desi Pop 4 and Mrs. Ik Joma ought to thank me for the 1500 some odd tapes of theirs I put together, shrink wrapped and boxed up. I also put a couple hundred cds for Tabi and Cotton Ginny instore music into sleeves. It was actually almost fun. I got to work with a guy named Russell who is allergic to just about every food. He can't eat sugar, most rices and milk products. A short list, but stuff that's in just about everything. He also rides a motorcycle and played one of the soldiers in X-Men 3. You know the guys that got disintegrated by the Phoenix? Yup, that was him. So work was good, and thankfully I get more of it, which means money, which is good, hurray! Now, I am le hungry and the chili that is in currently in the microwave shall be my remedy.

At last, at last! The bus gods have heard my prayers!! The 502 now leaves every TEN MINUTES between 6 and 9am and 4 and 6pm!!! Those of you who live in the city will be unimpressed by this, but for those of us who live out here on 'the edge of civilization' this is super exciting news! Ten minutes!! YAY!

In other news I keep having the weirdest dreams, mostly featuring people that I haven't seen in a very long time, or Mark's friends. For instance, the one where Chantelle owned a restaurant and was really mean to me, or the one where I was back in high school but Mike and Brad had become one person and was stalking me, or the one where I went fishing with Brad Pitt, Alisha and Alton, that one was odd. Maybe it's something I'm eating but this is just getting strange. I also had one dream where the soundtrack was all Postal Service songs. That one was a little awesome. I got to wake up singing 'The District Sleeps Alone Tonight'. Generally though the verdict is weird.

I've discovered the secret to Christmas shopping. You have to do it in carefully planned sections, knowing what you want and not staying out past 11am. I've almost finished all required shopping. I just can't tell my grandparents that thus far their Christmas money to me has been spent on alcohol, other people and a new sweater.

ha ha i got FIVE douglas adamses

Today I feel very accomplished, as the cute little cat thing is demonstrating above. I got many things done that needed to be done and it was excellent. I renewed my locker at school so my coveralls are safe for another semester, put some money in the bank and made it so I couldn't get to it so easily, finished watching Veronica Mars, got a christmas present for bcut, made a delicious teriyaki stir fry for dinner and cleaned the kitchen real well when I was done. Yay me! I also got completely soaking wet waiting for a bus that never came and hit on by another thirty something guy but I tried not to let that ruin things.

Dear all my male friends...who aren't gay, when you are thirty something come find me and tell me why someone like me appeals to you, cause seriously there're girls who're way more appealing than me out there to drool over, let me ride the bus in peace. I just don't understand...

Anyway, back to being accomplished and proud of myself. Tomorrow I'm supposed to be helping Sean make things for the play I keep forgetting I'm working on. Until then the plan is either paint the buddha (which sounds like a euphemism but isn't) or make Anger Management Muffins, perhaps both, we'll see.

This is a rather boring entry, my apologies but that's what I got.

Ambivalence.

I want to leave but I have no desire to go right now. I want to create but I have no imagination for the job at present. I want to come out and see you but you don't want to see me.

Thus, lethargy.

Ya, that's what I got. I think I'll make myself go out anyway. Bring Mindy's camera just in case, maybe I'll find some inspiration somewhere.

So thus far this morning I've yelled at the tv a little louder than I should have, found out Steph is going to meet her real father today, discovered that certain parts of psychology actually encourage boxing up your emotions (but only if it's a pretty box with a bow ;) ), and broken two plates and a glass in a blaze of glory. Seriously, you should have seen it. There was flailing limbs and shattering glass. It was pretty spectacular. And it's only 11:46!!! I can't wait to find out how the rest of the day is going to go!

Also, I am officially broke and only have three of seven Christmas presents bought/made, and I'm very very hooked on Battlestar Galactica, the only drawback being I have none of it to watch and therefore am going crazy! I blame the laws of reality for the first and Spookypants for the second, however he also holds the remedy so I guess it cancels itself out.

Is it wrong to be glad that I'm feeling better when the other people in my house are all succumbing to disease? Is succumbing a word?

Christmas break is deceiving. I feel like I have so much time and I've been doing all sorts of things I haven't had time for since school started. I've cleaned things, cooked things, (yum yum! curry and mexican lasagna!) I even had time to play video games! Hurray for KH2! Hurray for completely forgetting the plot line because I haven't played in so long! Hurray all round!

I keep waiting for the bad news though. Or maybe the bad news is that I'm broke and have nothing for anyone for Christmas? But I knew that already. There's something coming I imagine. But until then I choose to ignore the oncoming storm front and be pleased with my small pleasures.

Also, hell is Walmart and polaroid film is bloody expensive.

In my quest to feel connected, to put myself out there more, I'd forgotten why I'd stopped. You let someone in, that means they can hurt you if you let them.  I thought I'd learned?  Sitting, listening to the music and it feels like falling and my head screams 'detach! detach now if you value your life!'  and I don't, and I wonder why tears begin.  I didn't ask for these, they aren't mine, take them back, wretched things that they are.

Whatever. Painting and polaroids as therapy. At least i'll get some christmas present completed.